To my ex(act) colleagues at Evil Corp., Inc. (i.e: those left behind)

Hey guys, what’s up? I’m sorry I haven’t written…you know how it is. You get some separation. Start seeing other jobs. Look, over there…it’s a cute little landscaping position! Bang! The next thing you know you’re working somewhere else and you think less and less of those other folks….

Ha! Just kidding. I can’t get within six feet of a job right now for patently obvious reasons.

Also just kidding that I don’t think about y’all. It’s not every day, but it’s often enough. It’s been such a weird year that it seems almost impossible to me that we all were working together (for a couple of months, even) in this very calendar year.

But life do move on, so here’s to Joel, Lacey, Kire, Peg, Kris, Julie, the team I worked so intensely with for two year trying to fix things that were leagues beyond our power. That shit were brutal. I’d be hard pressed to work for a big company again after that. You know what? I don’t really like it any more so maybe I just won’t go.

But for serious and for true, I know I promised books in some silly-ass time-frame that we all knew was hogwash in the beginning and we all see what the plague has done to pretty much everything (which none of us saw coming). Well, part of ‘everything’ has turned out to be my writing…though I did manage to get about a quarter of the book done thus far, so I’m well along the way. The gears are clicking again and I actually still have an amazing amount of time left in the year to get this sucker finished and printed out on my beat-up laser printer so you can have something to use for fire-starter.

Don’t fret, it’s still a go. And you have to remember that time works differently outside of Evil Corp’s Office. To y’all, I’ve only been gone a week, but out here ten months has gone by in the real world. I’m a grandfather now.

And of course my ex-boss and friend of twenty years, Jackie who moved away from one big-ass forest fire in AZ right into the biggest fire in Colorado history. I mean, good choice….I guess? Hope you’re staying safe. Talk soon, I’m sure. You are a titan to have survived Evil Corp, Inc…..even thrived in that environment the way that you have. Anyone that can weather Raquel (was that her name?) for more than ten minutes could easily walk on the surface of Mars for a week without oxygen.

You know the one. Hard working. Upwardly mobile. Sucking the fun out of the room is the least of your worries with this example of corporate mistakery. I told an ex of mine one time that there was actually something worse than hatred, and that was indifference and I continue to believe that.

So here’s to everyone! (Except for, you know, that other one, who can go insert her plastic self straight into an ATM).

Look what happens when I get on a roll. Nonsense galore! Coming soon: date solicitations, comic reviews, and preparation for NaNoWriMo which I cannot believe begins in three short days.


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